50+ Top Funny Jokes For Kids ( 5073 )

50+ Top Funny Jokes For Kids

 

1. What did the guitar say to the guitar player?
   Stop stringing me along.
2. Why is a piano so hard to open?
   Because the keys are on the inside.
3. I kept thinking I could hear music coming from my printer.
   Turns out it is was jamming.
4. What did Jay-Z call his wife before they were married?
   Feyoncé.
5. Why do turkeys make the best drummers?
   Because they have drumsticks.
6. Why are pirates great singers?
   They hit the high C’s.
7. Why did the tortilla chip start dancing?
   Because someone put on the salsa.
8. Why did the fish make such a good musician?
   It was a natural with scales.
9. What kind of music do rabbits like best?
   Hip hop.
10. What do you call a musician with problems?
    Trebled.
11. What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race?
    Nothing. They fast.
12. Why is a baseball stadium always windy?
    Because it’s full of fans.
13. What kind of race is never run?
    A swimming race.
14. Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants?
    In case they get a hole in one.
15. What kind of pets like NASCAR?
    Lap dogs.
16. Why is Cinderella so bad at soccer?
    Because she always runs away from the ball.
17. Which type of goalkeeper can jump higher than a crossbar?
    All of them, crossbars can’t jump.
18. What animal can you always find at a baseball game?
    A bat.
19. Why did the police attend the baseball game?
    They heard that someone had stolen a base.
20. Why should you avoid dinner with a basketball player?
    Because they dribble.
21. When is a baseball player like a spider?
    When he catches a fly.
22. Why is tennis such a loud sport?
    The players raise a racquet.
23. What time is it when a golf ball goes through a window?
    Time to get a new window.
24. What lights up a soccer stadium?
    A soccer match.
25. Why are penguins good race drivers?
    Because they’re always in pole position.
26. How is a baseball team like a pancake?
    They both need a good batter.
27. Why did the orange lose the race?
    It ran out of juice.
28. Which insect do you not want to see in goal?
    A fumble bee.
29. Why aren’t chickens good at sports?
    Because they hit fowl balls.
30. What do you get when you cross a baseball pitcher with a carpet?
    A throw rug.
31. Why don’t baseball players join unions?
    Because they don’t like to be called out on strikes.
32. Why are there no football stadiums in space?
    Because there’s no atmosphere.
33. Why did the baker put the birthday cake in the freezer?
    Because it had to be iced.
34. How did the birthday party guests break their teeth?
    They bit into the marble cake.
35. How can you tell if an elephant’s been to your birthday party?
    There are footprints on your cake.
36. What did the pirate say exactly one year after their 79th birthday?
    Aye matey.
37. Patient: “Doctor, please help me. I get heartburn every time I eat birthday cake.”
    Doctor: “Well, next time, take off the candles.”
38. What does a turtle do on its birthday?
    It shell-ebrates.
39. What do you sing to a kangaroo once a year?
    Hoppy birthday.
40. What kind of cake does the Ice Queen like to eat on her birthday?
    The flavor doesn’t matter as long as it has lots of frosting.
41. What’s the most stressful moment for a dragon?
    Blowing out his birthday candles.
42. What kind of birthday cake do you get for a coffee fan?
    Choco-latte.
43. What did the grumpy candle say?
    “I hate birthdays. They burn me up.”
44. What flavor cake do elves like on their birthday?
    Strawberry shortcake.
45. Why do birthdays make kangaroos unhappy?
    They only get to celebrate them in leap years.
46. What do you give a 900-pound gorilla for its birthday?
    I don’t know, but you’d better hope it likes it.
47. Where does a snowman put birthday candles?
    On their birthday flake.
48. What do you sing to a cat on its birthday?
    Happy birthday to mew.
49. My family was so poor, the only thing I got on my birthday was another year older.
50. I got my best friend a fridge for his birthday.
    I can’t wait to see his face light up when he opens it.
51. Why should you stay away from trees?
    They can be a little shady.

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